Managing finances properly is key to our financial life, which is well known to each of us, I guess. I feel like this is in my bones so sometimes I make some decisions subconsciously. I recently ran into a situation where I found myself really awkward. Last July or August(I can't remember that clearly), one of my extended family cousin asked me for three thousand dollars as he lost his job and could not pay off his loans. I refuse to lend him the money cause I knew him well that he was not a solid trustworthy guy. A few days ago we met on a family reunion occasion and he did not really talk to me and I suddenly realized that it was because I didn't lend him money last year. I think about it twice and if he had not been that untrustworthy, I would have definitely lent him the money. Anyway, I hope he is doing fine now and best wishes to him.
You are right in your ways but I will say that people who cannot manage their expenses and also business strategy and also their Saving, they always get ruined. And I want to say that there has been similar occasion with me as my cousin asked to lend me some 50 or 100 dollar as he want to buy a phone as he has also some savings. I asked him to save more money and buy because lend from someone and than buy something is not good. And also I knew him that he was corrupt and do not return money too.
In both cases of you and Op, trustworthiness is the key factor that denied them the access to get what they asked for. While I feel that that of the OP is a high amount. $3k is an amount for investment or for project, unless the OP is rich that $3k means nothing to him if he losses it.
Which is the best approach I use, I don't lend to people and relatives anymore as they do not pay back, I only help them with what I can afford to lose and tell them not to pay back.
But in your own case, I wouldn't lend him money to buy phone unless the phone is gonna be an asset instead of a liability.
What I mean is that maybe he got a job that requires a smart phone, then I'll be sure it is a necessity.