See how dellusional you are.
Spamming this thread and thinking you only made 14 posts even though it was 4x more.
Just the same with your sob story. I don't know how your life is, but since you are trying this route is an obvious desperate move to recover your losses, nothing less and nothing more.

You made those bets, and you lost. It is YOUR fault and nobody else's. My life is fine, you better take care of your's before it too late. This is not a pun but some serious advise.