Dumbass, from now on you are appointed as my personal collector of gossip about me and all sorts of ridiculous accusations against me. You will report to me every week about new gossip, and I will pay you a small reward. Still, you are a clueless idiot, no longer fit for anything on this forum. Provocations, creating dramas out of nowhere, littering topics, eternal copy-paste of other people's works, spam translations without experience interacting with services - this is your ceiling for your worthless forum life.

Come on, start working.