Las Vegas. It's a heckuva town – but you've got to be careful there. One wrong move at the Luxor blackjack table and the pit boss will give you a personal demonstration of creative new uses for Black & Decker products. If you fail to laugh during Ray Romano's live show at The Mirage, they'll find your buzzard-picked bones somewhere out in the Mojave who knows how many weeks later. And this may be neither here nor there, but I'm still holding a grudge against the bartender at the Buca di Beppo because he wouldn't put extra cherries in my Rob Roy.

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