your topic title eludes to adding message into a tx
i fully understand you are however embedding the message into the private key before its ECC'd to a public key. much like using the message as a nonce/salt,random addition to private key generation thus YOUR system doesnt even require the extra data on the blockchain(in a tx) as its just seen as a single legacy address
but it requires partners pre-knowledge of private keys+message to create/spend..
which some people dont like the other party knowing the private key
No this is not correct. It does this with the public key... and therefore the other party most certainly does not need to have the private key!