Ladies and gentlemen, hodlers and jesters - I have seen the future, and it is shiny.

https://i.ibb.co/jP9hFjpx/20250605-2340-Bezwartos-ciowe-Monety-Bitcoin-simple-compose-01jx10h5spe8abc0hsd3rrj820.png

Today, I approached a humble Bitcoin ATM to withdraw a modest sum. I expected the usual: a few beeps, a screen that looks like it was coded in 1997, and a digital transaction. But no. Not today.

The machine clanked, whirred… and out came ACTUAL BITCOIN COINS.
Real. Physical. Clinkity. Coins.

Either:
A) The ATM achieved sentience and misunderstood "proof of work"
B) Satoshi returned in the form of a rogue vending machine
C) I’ve been pranked by a time-traveling Victorian banker

Attached is photographic proof of this monetary miracle.
Beware, friends - today it’s coins. Tomorrow, it may demand a goat in exchange for 0.01 BTC.