
i blame myself, does that count as blame game?
That's good, because taking responsibility for every action of yours is always the first approach to was the solution of every problem. Many people are used to apportion blames on others and is very bad, it doesn't speak good of you as a person but rather it blindfold you from the actual truth.
But taking responsibility in every actions in life only gives you a chance of repentance and making corrections to was a positive change.