To understand what you were trying to say, but after reading your writing, I realized that your writing clearly has a personal emotion. Many people have such feelings about Satoshi. Over time, a distance has been created between reality and imagination, and Satoshi is now a historical figure who is discussed but cannot be caught.
The words "this forum was his house" deeply resonate with me. Maybe somewhere, in some old thread, his shadow still remains, and someone like us is following the path of that shadow. But all of these are just our ideas; we don't know anything about whether he actually exists or not. And the answer you are looking for may no longer be possible. You have already understood why it is not possible through many reply posts.