Geez, Do all newbies have to go through this shit?

Quite a nice welcome!!!

Pretty much. Not just newbies either. I've been involved in 20,000 BTC worth of trades here and sold goods in dozens of different countries and I still get the 3rd degree from every buyer who orders an oz of silver from me. Welcome to bitcointalk. It only gets better... /sarcasm
Off topic radio aside, how about this price action today? The market now expecting a rate cut in the near future. Hopefully we see a similar (or much larger) candle when MSTR gets included in the S&P500 index. The next couple of weeks could be fun.