Ok, after a week and a half of searching it is CLEAR that there is no easy solution to this problem.
The goal or problem is checking the balance of a ton of addresses without having to import them with keys without having to run a linux machine, without having to run anything in python, just plain and simple copy a list of addresses......
1EMXdJrLUhyh5ycijPzmJKWGStQ915VGSJ
1EmXdS1QPA7wmJqH7WtfwaV6rM88LC9t6F
etc....
etc....
etc.....
to make such a software for the community to use.
What community is this useful for? Other people I've seen asking for this are trying to crack brainwallets (ineptly).