If me and 10 (or however many) pals mined a coin for two years, then announced it on bitcointalk, I'm afraid it'd be classed as pre-mined by the community. Simple really. This is what happened. There is no doubt about it.

I have no horses in the XMR race (but I do hold some BBR), but let me say that independent of the OP -- and with a little less venom and swearing -- it was very clear from the code that the bytecoin premine was fake.  Nothing to do with the whitepaper, and you can find the obsfucated and slowed-down code in the git history of XMR and Bytecoin.

I have no comment about the other coins, and personally believe both that the XMR dev team is reasonably clean and that BBR was a good-faith effort to create something non-scammy, but I don't have a technical basis for that conclusion.

I don't want you to buy any coin (and I'd never advise anyone to put money on cryptocurrencies unless they want to gamble).  But I do believe it's worthwhile suggesting to people somewhat emphatically that they stay the heck away from BCN and tread carefully with some of the clones that just copy-pasted that code, as much as they should be careful with any alt that just copy-pastes the Bitcoin code and tweaks a few parameters.  Most are at best worthless and at worst outright scams.  The thing that adds potential value to a coin that's not actively used is its development, community (consider dogecoin as an example of the latter, and both BBR and XMR as examples of the former), and in some cases, its underlying technical innovations (cryptonote broadly speaking).

And before you fling accusations, I'm quite sure I'm not a sock puppet:  http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dga/crypto/not_a_sock_puppet.html