everyone is free to fork off with their new and improved bitcoin instead of whining and bitching here to no end.
I don't think anyone doesn't understand that.
The point is, how do we reach agreement, not what to do if we can't agree.
we who? agree on what? bitcoin is the bitcoin currently bought and sold at $16K by those who vote by putting their coins/money where their mouth is. Those who disagree/don't like the product have infinite alternatives, including doing their own thing.
I'm not disputing anything you've just said. To change the system (ie. fork it) we, thats all the stake holders, need to reach some sort of consensus. If there are enough people not in the consensus, they will probably refuse to fork and continue the existing chain, and thats where the problem will be.
The more the significant players in Bitcoin fork from each other the weaker it becomes, until we are left with a million different Bitcoins, one for every little group.