Quote from: pawel7777 on April 18, 2018, 03:38:35 PM

Quote from: Kogs on April 18, 2018, 12:51:20 PM

If there is no more love in the relationship it's just stupid to stay together.

...

That's a fair point, but with that mindset - marriage is not for you. Why would you get married and pledge your life-long commitment ("for good and bad... until death do us part") if all you really mean is "until I'm 100% satisfied".

The idea behind marriage is (was?) to start a family. The person you married becomes your closest family, and you don't abandon/replace your family even when things get rough, you work it through. Can you imagine anyone abandoning their child or mother because 'things weren't very great between us lately'?

But sadly, that only worked when divorces were rare and socially unacceptable. You simply had no other way but to make things work and fix your relationship. Currently, when things go bad, the first thought is "am I better off alone?" or "would I be happier with someone else?".

Relationship dynamics are a motherfucker. With loose social/religious norms it's hard to pull off a lifelong relationships, unless both parties got it figured out and know exactly what they want. That's why marriage rates are higher (and divorce rates lower) in the upper class, when people tend to be more intelligent.

You interpreted my mindset quite well. I really don't plan to get married because I don't see a value for me to do so.
A relationship can work as well or as bad if you are married or not.

If you love your choosen partner until the bitter end and your partner feel the same for you that's the perfect scenario which often enough happens.
But don't forget the other people who don't have the luck to find their soul mate. I don't think those couples should stay together when they don't love each other anymore. But of course you should first try to work on the relationship and try to fix it before going separated ways. I don't mean you should give up a relationship after the first small discrepancy.

You say, the person you married becomes your closest family. I agree with that. But sometimes it happens that this person becomes your biggest enemy.

When there are children involved it gets more complicated but even then I think it can be better when the parents don't live together. If a child get love by separate living parents or even get love by only one parent it can be better than parents who constantly fight each other.

And also if they stay in the relationship it will prevent them that they can find a better partner.

Quote from: pawel7777 on April 18, 2018, 03:38:35 PM

In short: Don't get married if you're not ready to commit 100%.

That's the main problem. Too much people don't follow this rule. They rush with the decission to marry someone and then wonder why the relationship did not hold.