She cant allow or disallow it because god is a figment of your imagination. She cant destroy me because she only lives in the mind of you, David Koresh, and millions of other nutters.
She has turned someone into rock salt, caused a flood that killed almost everyone, killed children, killed women, created plagues that terrorized her creations and generally shown contempt for something she created.
All blabber talk^^^. Why? Because you can't show any proof against the combined sciences of cause and effect, entropy, and complexity.
Why dont you kill yourself so you can go see her faster and at the same time save the world from having one of you types around?
God's commands are that people don't kill themselves without the reason of saving other lives... kinda like Spock says, "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few." Why don't you go kill yourself to see if God exists or not? After all, if you think that He doesn't exist, in your mind you wouldn't be disobeying any of His laws by doing so. After all, even you know that God might exist somewhere you haven't checked for Him. Maybe He exists in death. Wouldn't it be fun checking death out?